A Female Perspective on Dating

Hi All. My name is Betty. I suppose you’re wondering what the hell a woman is doing on Woody’s blog. Well, there are technically lots of women on Woody’s blog (and you’re all quite beautiful), but you know what I mean. A woman? Posting on Woody’s blog? Weeiiiiirdd…Kinda. Not really, if you ask me, though. Every male perspective needs a female opinion. Come to think of it, every everything needs a female opinion, hmmm? Anyway, this is my fancy way of saying that the handsome and hilarious Woody asked me to do a guest post, and I figured, ‘eh, what the hell else do I have to do, right?’ So I agreed. And being the gorgeous, popular, single girl in my twenties that I am (wink, wink), I thought, what better subject than dating and what I’ve learned from being out there? So stay tuned for this girl’s take on the dating pool I live in.

1. I have dated all ages of men. I dated a 19 year old when I was 21, a 35 year old when I was 25, and a 26 year old when I was 26. I also dated a guy 6 years younger than me a few months ago, and if you knew how old I was, you would know that is YOUNG – well, young for someone my age. I’ve learned a couple things about age. I won’t pretend to be a professional, but I’ve learned, and observed in my friends’ relationships, that when you are in your 20’s you will have the best luck dating someone close to your age. We change so much in our twenties. Example: I can barely decide what pair of shoes to wear in the morning; trying to relate to someone outside a couple years’ maturity is very hard. And that 26 year old I dated when I was 26? If he hadn’t had an erectile issue (it’s IMPORTANT!! … is that vain?), we might still be together.

2. Things I learned from dating men of all ages. A: They know within seconds if they are interested in you for sex or something more. If you listen to your gut, so will you. B: They all want sex. Some of them are nicer about it, some are meaner, but they all want it. C: The younger ones are more willing to work for it. The much younger one I dated swept me off my feet, and totally romanced me and was just so vocal about how much he cared. And I ended up sleeping with him. Maybe I shouldn’t have, but he was gorgeous and I could tell he was hung and he was just so damned eager to please!! D: The older ones won’t work as hard for it, but when they get you there, they Know . What. They’re. Doing. Now, I like sex, but I have not had a ton of partners. The 35 year old? That guy knew what he was doing, and although he was not the biggest (ahem) I’ve had, he knew exactly what to do. He was the one I had the most fun with. The lesson? They all want sex and they’re all the same when it comes to the brown-chicken-brown-cow (if that doesn’t make sense, sing it in porno music.) Now, that being said, the youngin’ (let’s call him Z) wanted a relationship; however, “relationship” to him and “relationship” to me were two totally different things. STAY WITHIN YOUR AGE GROUP, PEOPLE. The older one? Just wanted sex. And the 26 year old with the winky issue? He was totally relationship ready. I kyboshed that because sex is very important and he couldn’t have it; or…at least not very well. I don’t know why, and I tried to stay and help him, but I could only do so much.

3. If you are anything like me or my equally busy friends, you have tried online dating. And if you have seen an online dating website (one you pay for, not the creepo free ones…), you know there are TONS of guys on there, looking for girls. Cute ones, ugly ones, fat ones, skinny ones. I met some awesome guys on the site I used. I should note that I signed up merely out of curiousity and boredom, and I don’t regret it…completely. Anywho, I digress. I met some awesome guys, guys that I am still friends with. I also got my heart broken for the first time (yeah, I was old to have a first heartbreak, but I always did all the heartbreaking. Not vain, just true), hardcore, by a guy with arm sleeve tattoos and gorgeous blue eyes. My point? Yeah, try it. But go into it knowing that those guys can say anything online, and even if they tell you they want to be exclusive, if your gut tells you different (or he puts his profile back on the site…asshole,) he’s using you. Or he’s an immature assface.

4. Date lots of people. I’m not saying sleep with lots of people. As you get to know me (and I hope you will), you’ll find out that I am not the girl that is ok with having a fully notched bedpost. But DATE!! That is one thing about dating in your twenties: the dating pool is HUGE. If I wanted, I could have a few dates every weekend, and probably some during the week, too. I totally think that a girl in her twenties should date as much as possible. How else will you find out what you want, who you want to marry someday. Something else I’ve learned? All these guys love it when you are willing to try something new. So get in the kayak or on the dirtbike. You’ll have fun and odds are super small that you’ll die, so why not? Right?

I am single right now. After A, aka “online jerk ” I dated a couple guys, including Z (youngin’) who made me realize I could in fact be turned on by someone again after all, but I have not found someone that I felt connected to like A. I’m not saying I was in love with him (ok, I was), but the biggest lesson I had to learn was to protect my heart a little bit. I don’t jump right in anymore. I am very cautious about what I tell people. There is a veneer on the info I share with men, so I don’t get hurt as easily. I guess the biggest lesson I’ve learned so far is that people are gonna hurt each other. People are gonna feel things for people who don’t reciprocate those feelings. And you’re gonna be at home some Saturdays with nothing to do, feeling like a lame-o because you don’t have a date, or you’re not up in da club with the girls, drinkin’ and being generally hot and awesome. And that’s ok. Because as confusing as dating is, it’s also got its high points: The giddy magic is still there when you meet someone new and you’re still allowed to make mistakes without people just shaking their heads at you…
Ok, now back to sexy time – thanks for indulging this girl who has no previous blogging experience! Oh, and one last thing? Always listen to Woody. He will never steer you wrong. Unless by wrong you mean into his bed, or a quiet forest park somewhere. If that’s the case, he will most definitely try to steer you wrong, but you will probably go, because hello!! Hotness!


6 Responses to “A Female Perspective on Dating”

  1. March 11, 2010 at 6:19 pm

    I can relate a lot with this article.
    I haven’t dated any younger guys though but maybe i should since they are so eager to please lol..

    • March 11, 2010 at 6:45 pm

      Whoa whoa whoa…hang on there Jennifer and Betty. I’m NOT a younger guy but I am much more of a pleaser and giver than I should be. I simply get more enjoyment out of making (and more specifically, watching) a woman receive please from my hands and…stuff. You think a 20 year old is going to know how to massage the stress away? You think he knows how to wash your hair for you and pamper you without acting like a monkey jerking off in a cage? Pfft…hell no! Do I want sex? Ummm, yea..check. Is that all I want…no way. I want the woman I’m with to be so happy about how I treat her that she can’t wait for me to get home. I will admit, that my attitude and intent is likely in the minority of men my age. So to Betty’s credit, I agree with everything here. She pretty much has it down.
      Thanks for the post Betty! Should we have her back MW readers? What’s that? As long as she’s naked next time..??? Well, ok then…you heard the audience Betty, strip and write baby!

      • 3 Betty
        March 11, 2010 at 10:28 pm

        Jenni~ Not sayin’ you’ll get a relationship out of it, but it might not matter for the stamina factor 😉 I don’t regret it in the least!!

        Woody ~ Calm down, calm down. I will give you this. The older guy I dated that just wanted nookie? I even said in my post that he knew what he was doing. He was VERY attentive, and could go much longer than the young one. Plus, we did do some hair-washing, and I thought that was super-tender. I liked that a lot. So we absolutely believe you when you speak to the benefits of an man vs. boy!!

        (And FYI, I have my clothes on for this comment. But since rules are rules, if I have to be naked for every future guest spot, I promise I will write sans accoutrement…) 😉
        *kiss* B

  2. March 11, 2010 at 10:14 pm

    I feel like I missed out big time by meeting my hubby-to-be when I was 19. I sewed a lot of wild oats, but 13 years later I am looking back and wishing I had spent more time exploring.
    We definitely need Betty back 🙂

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